Friday, January 08, 2021

You Don't Need A Weatherman To See Which Way The Wind Blows

Well, now that we've got the DC riots out of the way, we can get on to the main event - fundamentally transforming America to attack racism and hate. I'll give you 10-1 odds that some time in the next 4 years, I will be expected to attend racial indoctrination training. That assumes I don't quit first or quit at the announcement of the training. I don't need this job, it's just a nice income stream that allows us to build up resources to buy a vacation home in the Confederate States of America* **.

Note to readers: The CSA line of jokes won't become a theme on this blog. I liked it for this post, but that's enough of that. Sorry if they're annoying.

In a sadistic way, I'm kind of hoping they do it sooner rather than later. The sessions will be massacres, just like the Lean Six Sigma training we did for senior employees back in the day. I'm sure Ohioan remembers those. They were glorious.

The LSS training session turned into an absolute turkey shoot of the instructors. It answered the question, "What would happen if you had Soviet-style management without the Soviet security apparatus?"

Without the threat of the NKVD coming in and shooting us, we tore the trainers apart. I will hereby admit to be one of the chief attackers. I've worked at this place a long time and my cerebral cortex is connected to my mouth with only the most rudimentary of filters in between. I can't stand stupidity and I hate lies, both of which filled this training session. The training was supposed to give us a fundamental understanding of how LSS worked. Had they stuck with that, we would have sat there, quietly and endured the day as we have so many other times when we've been subjected to this kind of nonsense. Instead, the trainers tried to sell us on the idea as well and used all kinds of examples of LSS success, none of which applied to us... 

I don't think any of us wanted to beat these guys up. One of us even asked, "Are all of these sessions this hard for you?" The instructor replied, "Each one is worse than the last." 

If that was bad, I can't even imagine what it will be like when they round us up and accuse us of being bigots.

Thinking about this possible event, depending on how much my investments have grown, I might put in my resignation papers before going to the training and then going full Nathan Bedford Forrest*** on them in the classroom. 

"Does the damned fool want to be blown up? Well, blow him up then. Give him hell, Captain Morton- as hot as you've got it, too."

* - I'm with Solzhenitsyn on this one. If I'm going to be punished for a crime, I might as well have the fun of committing it or at least pretending to commit it. What are they going to do, punish me twice?

** - In all seriousness, I've just about had it with pulling threads on the CSA, reading source documents. I think I've got the thing worked out sufficiently and have come to the conclusion that Jeff Davis' great contribution to America was to deliberately kill 700,000 people prosecuting a war that was clearly lost by the middle of 1863. Hmm. Maybe that wasn't a contribution at all.

In any case, every Confederate biography has the exact same arc. It's getting frustrating to read them.

*** - Hey, I told you I was going to have some fun with this.

4 comments:

Ohioan@Heart said...

KT - Oh Yeah, I remember the LSS inanity.

I have two stories about the 'glorious' training and LSS. But they are both kinda long, so I won't bore anyone with them. The saddest thing though is that it was probably not the most obvious case of our place doing something because we were told to, even though it was patently stupid for our organization to do it. That 'honor' belongs to the reorganization we did shortly thereafter.

Ohioan@Heart said...

I should have also added that the stories I heard from others who were in the training session with KT ranged from legendary to completely mythical.

K T Cat said...

LOL!

One Brow said...

If that was bad, I can't even imagine what it will be like when they round us up and accuse us of being bigots.

If they are accusing you of being bigots, they are doing their job very poorly.