Sunday, October 23, 2016

Criminal Activity In San Diego

I'm saddened to report that last night, a gang of criminals broke into my house while I slept and cooked an elaborate meal for what looks like a dozen people. They then left without cleaning up. I came downstairs to the wreckage this morning.

Words fail me. I'm disgusted that the authorities would allow a band of rogue chefs to wander unchecked, breaking into homes, cooking and leaving behind ruins like this.

What's this world coming to when an innocent householder is afraid for the cleanliness of his kitchen?


Ohioan@Heart said...

Did they at least leave you some leftovers?

Jedi Master Ivyan said...

The evidence suggests cajun cooking. (There's a can of Tony Cs on the counter.) Now, who do you know that cooks cajun food?

Ilíon said...

I fear it was the raccoons! They have whole cities underneath our cities, living in the storm drains and so forth. Periodically, they kidnap a human household (*) and replace the inhabitants with raccoons -- there are entire districts (**) where most or all the inhabitants are really raccoons.

Beware! lest you wake on day to find that you are a furry masked vermin!

(*) what they do with the human is best not dwelt upon

(**) Dem voting, naturally

K T Cat said...

Ohioan - Well, they were nice enough to package some of their food into Tupperware and Ziplock bags, so it's not a total loss.

K T Cat said...

Ivyan, the answer to that is simple. They also snuck into my cookbooks, the fiends!

Ilion - See, this is why the Catican Guards need to be reinforced with a Coon Hound. I just haven't been able to get the Defense budget increased.