The Story Of Jolly Bear

Explanation: I've been noodling about transgender people quite a bit on this blog. This story is a motivation of that.

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Very soon after the fall of the Soviet Union, my first wife and I adopted a little girl from Russia. She was 15 months old when I went to get her. My wife did not go with me as she was anxious about the safety of the trip. Many stories live in those sentences, but Jolly Bear was the final story from Russia. Coming home, my daughter and I flew British Air from Moscow to London. I wanted to kiss the carpet of the British Air jet as the people in it were smiling. Those were the first warm smiles I had seen since I landed in Russia.

Sitting beside me were an elderly British couple. We exchanged our stories and the woman decided to do us a kindness and from the duty-free cart, bought a little teddy bear who wore a cable-knit sweater with the Union Jack on it for my daughter. I broke down in tears and told her that it was the first toy my daughter had ever received. The British woman, being very British, choked back her own tears and simply said, "I say. That's rather extraordinary."

I replied, "What's his name? You have to give him a name, you know."

She said, "Let's call him Jolly Bear." And so we did.

Jolly Bear.

I've written in the past about my "good friend" who is a woman that thinks she's a man. That's my daughter. She's 24 now and has been on testosterone for the last year and a half. I see her about twice a year. It's always an ambush. I typically get 5 minutes of warning that she's coming over.

Wife kitteh and I are the only people left in her life who won't agree that she's a man. She's been coached by trans influencers to stop interacting with anyone who denies it. When we get together, we don't discuss it. I won't call her by her new name and I won't use her pronouns. That makes conversations arduous.

When she first came out to me, I wasn't at all prepared for it. She'd been thoroughly coached by the LGBT crew. I was totally blindsided and had no idea how to respond. I couldn't come up with anything concrete, but told her not to do anything that would cause permanent harm.

She'd always been offbeat, but she'd never been masculine. She'd had several boyfriends and I came into the garage once to find her and a boyfriend making out on the couch we had there with the video game TV. Her "mom," my first wife, never denied her much of anything and rarely required her to do well in school. She refused to support my daughter's soccer career. 

I did everything on the parenting side with only half custody. We spent a ton of time together, working on school, going on soccer trips and more. I knew her very, very well. She was never masculine in any way. She wasn't a princess girl, but she was definitely a girl.

She went to public high school and was straight until probably late in her senior year. When she graduated, she moved in with her mom full time because mom expected nothing from her. She worked minimum wage jobs and seemed to be doing well. I'm guessing that she started hanging around with the LGBT crowd around then. Her mom paid for her to go to the San Francisco Pride Week festivities and that was a pivotal moment.

From there to here, dealing with her has been like entering a fun house mirror maze. Nothing makes sense, but you can't escape. You can't give up on your daughter, but you can't have a full conversation with her because of the threat of being cut out of her life forever.

I recently discovered Parents with Inconvenient Truths about Trans (PITT). This entry in particular applies to my daughter. In it, a scientist describes his research into what we know about gender treatments. It matches what I've seen in my daughter.

The brain is clearly impacted by hormonal changes in the body and that the brain is an endocrine organ. Would it not make sense then, to understand if there is a chemical basis for these feelings that can be addressed, short of “transition”. In other words, what are the impact of hormones on the brain?

There ARE studies available about the impacts of trans-medicalization (specifically wrong sex hormones) on the brain — and the results are not good at all...

Gender ideologues say that taking estrogen “feminizes” the brain. It does no such thing. What it appears to do is change blood flow, reduce the size of the brain, interfere with executive function, cause dangerously high build-ups of glutamate, and lead to early-onset dementia and high risk of stroke...

Mueller et al, observed in their structural MRI study of persons on wrong sex hormones, that “Ventricular enlargement has not only been associated with grey matter reduction due to aging , but has also been identified as a putative marker for progression of Alzheimer’s Disease or a risk factor for psychopathology.

On the wrong sex hormones, your brain shrinks and you begin to go mad. My daughter is now being treated for depression and anxiety, which is not unusual for women being poisoned with testosterone. She'd never had those problems in the past. The last time I saw her, she had the shakes. Her endocrine system is in crisis and as a result, her central nervous system is breaking down. She's already suffered permanent physical damage. I can't see how this ends well.

And so it goes.

Our education industry, our media, our entertainers and the entire Democratic Party are not only fine with this, they're egging these poor people on to more and more harm. All I can do is pull a reference from Star Trek. Commodore Decker perfectly sums up my feelings about the lot of them. They say there's no devil, but there is. Right out of Hell.