Saturday, September 08, 2018

Nike's Best And Brightest Hire Colin Kaepernick

Nike is a huge brand. Its marketing and advertising team consists of people from the very best universities with impeccable resumes and decades of experience. Yes, Nike's marketing team is an excellent example of the global elites of 2018.

We're so screwed.

Our betters, our masters, the people with all the right connections, all the right degrees and all the right opinions picked Colin Kaepernick as their spokesperson. Pure genius, guys.


It's an ad campaign to sell shoes and they ended up with over a quarter of their market hating them because of it. They're selling shoes. How hard can it be to come up with an ad campaign for shoes that doesn't make people hate you? Well, it was algebraic topology for these idiots.

I can just hear the report in the board meeting.
VP of Marketing: Gentlemen, our new ad campaign is a success. We only lost 10% of market share.

CEO: Excellent work, Johnson. That's the kind of stellar performance I've come to expect from your team!
Everywhere you look, you see that many of the so-called elites are imbeciles.

3 comments:

ligneus said...

Imbeciles, I'll remember that next time someone with a perfectly good brain [David Frum comes to mind for some reason] seems unable to put it to any good use.

As for Kaepernickers,

http://www.bookwormroom.com/2018/09/04/bookworm-beat-9-4-18-nike-kaepernick/kaepernick-is-al-bundy/

tim eisele said...

They have been dumping potential customers for decades, why stop now? Around a fifth of the population can't use Nike products even if they want to, at least not comfortably, because their damned shoes don't fit us. Anyone with feet wider than D width is just out of luck (I take a EEEE shoe myself). There are only a vanishingly small number of shoemakers that even think about us at all (most notably New Balance). The rest of them clearly don't care about maximizing their potential customers, and can get stuffed as far as I'm concerned.

lee said...

I wear EE. Never been able to wear Nikes. Asics used to fit me, but New Balance is cheaper.

Neoneocon or the New Neo too a look at Nike's claims about their sales being up. Not so fast:

https://www.thenewneo.com/2018/09/08/are-nikes-sales-up-post-kaepernick/