Fun Facts About Fog

Today, the kids and I and one of their friends went whale watching. We didn't see any whales. Instead, we cruised out of San Diego Bay right into a huge fog bank. The fog looked like this.

Fog.
As a special bonus, there was a fog expert on board who gave us a long lecture about fog*. Here, with a stylistic acknowledgement to Harvey and Frank J, are the highlights of her talk.

• Fog is made up mostly of water vapor.


• It also contains trace amounts of chromium, potassium and pancakes.


• In the South they're called griddlecakes.


• Fog migrates from the ocean to the shore every day.


• Do not make any sudden movements around fog. If startled, it can deliver a painful sting.


• Fog is not deterred by crosses, garlic or silver bullets.


• Instead, you can ward off fog with some sliced mushrooms and onions sauteed in chicken broth.


• Fog's only vulnerable spots are its eyes. If you have to engage in hand-to-hand combat with fog, go for its eyes.


• The Spanish word for fog is La Jolla.


• Fog has a symbiotic relationship with whales. It hides them and they sing to it.


• Fog is more afraid of you than you are of it.

There. I hope that helps you the next time you have to deal with fog. We all thoroughly enjoyed our fog watching cruise. It was foggerific!

* - She may have been a whale expert from Scripps Institute of Oceanography, but I wasn't really paying much attention. I was revelling in the glory of fog instead.