Mitt Romney, the Mirror Candidate

The National Review has endorsed Mitt Romney. Over at The Corner, they go bananas on a daily basis against John McCain and Mike Huckabee, pointing out seemingly endless examples of conservative apostasies on their parts. Talk radio with the exception of Michael Medved has also gone insane, railing for hours every day about the villainous pigs that oppose "true conservatism".

And the true conservative candidate is who, exactly? Mitt Romney? Just what is this guy, anyway? In Michigan, he's a big-government man, promising billions to rescue the auto industry. In Iowa, he's Mr. Investment, promising billions for ethanol subsidies. In South Carolina, he's Mr. Tax Cut. In Florida he's fighting for massive government programs for prescription drugs. Before he declared for the presidency, he was all over the map on Iraq, mumbling inarticulate positions which left him wiggle room in case the whole surge thing went sour.

Meanwhile, you have periodicals and talk show hosts who have made a career of articulating very strong positions on all these issues falling over themselves to support him. What do they see in him?

Probably exactly what he wants all of us to see. Ourselves.

Mitt Romney as seen by talk radio and NRO.
But that's not who he is, right? He can't be. It's time for these people to grow up and stop swooning like high school girls in love with the quarterback.

"Oh, I know he promised things to all those other girls, but I know him better than that. He told me he would be true to me. He's so tall and strong and handsome, he'd never lie to me. I'm different."

If people like Kathryn Jean Lopez and Mark Levin were 16-year-old girls they'd be pregnant with Mitt's love child. Both of them. As well as almost everyone else at NRO and Rush and Sean Hannity and, my God, above all else, Hugh Hewitt. Hugh would be having twins or triplets.

So Mitt goes on and on with the platitudes and absolutely preposterous platform statements. His illegal immigration position just keeps getting more ridiculous all the time. 10,000,000+ people processed in 90 days? Just how do you do that? Never mind. He said you were his only one. Forgive me for doubting your beau. He must be really, err, eager to see you.

Mike Huckabee had the best line in recent memory on Mr. Dreamy. Dig this.

The fanatics and screamers on the blogs and in talk radio have looked at Mitt Romney and fallen in love with the one person they could be with the rest of their lives.

Themselves.

Update: There's more good stuff on this from Matt's Corner.

Brutus over at Pro Liberate et Veritas has a good post on Mr. Conservative Savior's economic record.

The Wall Street Journal takes Romney out behind the barn and shoots him. Dig this:

Washington's problem isn't a lack of data, or a failure to calibrate the incentives as in the business world. Congress and the multiple layers of government respond exactly as you'd expect given the incentives for self-preservation and turf protection that always exist in political institutions. The only way to overcome them is with leadership on behalf of good ideas backed by public support. The fact that someone as bright as Mr. Romney doesn't recognize this Beltway reality risks a Presidency that would get rolled quicker than you can say Jimmy Carter.

All the more so because we haven't been able to discern from his campaign, or his record in Massachusetts, what his core political principles are. Mr. Romney spent his life as a moderate Republican, and he governed the Bay State that way after his election in 2002. While running this year, however, he has reinvented himself as a conservative from radio talk show-casting, especially on immigration.

Ouch.

Warner Todd Huston over at StoptheACLU gets close to the right conclusion, but doesn't want to believe his eyes and instead falls back on thinking with his heart. Mitt's not a "puzzle", Mr. Huston, he's a mirror.