You Know What Mozilla Needs? It Needs A Good, Old-Fashioned Purge

Thanks be to random, sub-atomic particle variations! That spawn of homophobic, Christic superstition, Brendan Eich, has resigned from Mozilla. Eich proved his homophobia by donating to Proposition 8. After that,what choice did open-minded people have but to force him out through protests and threats? Eich's removal, while a crucial step in the right direction, is not enough.

Ponder this: Where do CEOs come from? Many times, they come from a company's employees. Just because we've managed to dispose of that scourge of diversity and free thought, the danger hasn't passed. In fact, it may have only gotten worse. Eich's removal means there is a void at the top of the company. If he is replaced from within, it will create a ripple effect of openings all the way down the management chain from CEO to team leader. Who's to say that many of these spots won't be given to homophobes?

If steps aren't taken, then removing Eich may well have made things even worse. Unless Eich's ouster is accompanied by a company-wide purge, we can't be certain that the threat has been removed. It's not just Mozilla, either. These purges must occur in all of our workplaces. Mozilla's product, a web browser, is very nice, but it's hardly as important to the critical task of moving America forward as, say, fair trade coffee, reusable grocery bags or hybrid cars. We must all take action immediately if we are to rid ourselves of these monsters.

Do you know which of your coworkers are homophobes? Some of them may be indentifiable through the Proposition 8 donor database, but most of them will not be so easy to spot. The best way to find them is to determine which of them belong to homophobic cults. Which employees are Catholic, Evangelical, Lutheran (Missouri and Wisconsin Synods) or Moslem? Some of them may self-identify making culling easy. Others will try to go underground and conceal their homophobic activities.

Fortunately, the Federal Government is on the side of the righteous. With the help of the NSA, the FBI and the IRS, tech companies have access to massive databases profiling individual behavior and, in particular, affiliations. Individuals who donate to their churches are required to report these donations if they wish to obtain tax deductions. If a person surfs to a parish website, it's a good bet they're trying to find the schedules for cult activities. Phone records and text messages will also show who among us is associated with these hate-based groups. Since Silicon Valley companies are on our side, it will be easy to spot the cult members if we all pull together.

Thanks to the foresight of the Obama Administration, these tools are at our disposal right now. All we need do is use them. Eich's removal was just the beginning of what will be a long, arduous process of ridding ourselves of the scourge of homophobia. Do your part and demand the purge. Only after we remove and re-educate these people will we be able to live in a truly open and free world.

Re-education camps for the homophobes don't have to be dull, dreary places. They can be filled with fun group activities like this!