The Prayer Of St. Grumpus

I went to Confession on Friday night. I don't call it Reconciliation like all those modern Catholic hipsters do, by gum, it's Confession. I have sinned and I need to confess.

Amongst my acts of penance, the priest gave me the Prayer of St. Francis as a focus of meditation. When I read it and thought how it applied in my life, mostly where I had fallen short, I had to laugh. As I sat there at Adoration, in the presence of Christ, reading those beautiful and timeless words, I came up with this bit of doggerel.

The Prayer of St. Grumpus - Patron Saint of Socio-Econo-Political Bloggers

Lord, make me an instrument of gloomy thought.
Where there is hatred, let me sow snark;
where there is injury, indignation;
where there is doubt, gloom;
where there is despair, more despair;
where there is darkness, anger;
and where there is sadness, resignation.

I cut the prayer short because this is a blog and everything needs to be concise. Save your comments about the meter, I already know it doesn't work like it does in the original.

I blame the progressives and libertines.