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Monday, December 22, 2008

Who Should be the US' new Lapdog?

In scouring the Internets Tubes for information about just what the Greek Socialist party stood for aside from improved rock and gasoline bomb throwing, I came across this bit of news:
The (Holland Socialist) party calls for a society where the values of “human dignity, equality and solidarity” are most prominent, and has been scathing in its attacks on what it describes as “the culture of greed”, brought about by “a capitalism based on inflated bonuses and easy money”. Like Die Linke, the SP campaigns on a staunchly anti-war platform — demanding an end to Holland’s role as “the US’s lapdog”.
First off, I didn't know Holland was our lapdog nor even that we had one. As I thought more about it, I realized that we, as Supreme World Power and Viciously Militaristic Hegemon, desperately need one. What's the point* of ordering our shock troops to invade some poor innocent country and steal their oil if we don't have a lapdog to pet and feed small bits of meat while we gloat like the Bond villain Blofeld?

With that in mind and given that the mighty socialists may soon rip poor, little, fluffy Holland from our laps, I ask you: Who should be our new lapdog?

Is this Luxembourg, Belize, El Salvador or someone else?

* - I realize that one completely worthwhile point is to send people like Sean Penn into paroxysms of rage, but work with me here.

1 comment:

  1. Puppy?

    Puuuuu-peeeeee......

    *walks around trying to find their lapdog*

    ReplyDelete