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Thursday, September 11, 2008

Doesn't Deepak Chopra Worship Trees or Something Like That?

After reading this, you might think he does. He's got a full on case of PDS*.

One thing is for sure. Deepak is an idiot.
If you have happy thoughts, then you make happy molecules. On the other hand, if you have sad thoughts, and angry thoughts, and hostile thoughts, then you make those molecules which may depress the immune system and make you more susceptible to disease.
Happy molecules? Well, by all means, lets have more of those!

* - Palin Derangement Syndrome

10 comments:

  1. Happy molecules? Don't you remember that from chemistry class? :-)

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  2. All I know about Deepak Chopra is that it was his book that they used for that one little part in One Hour Photo.

    Honestly, I dodn't know he was a real person

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  3. I thought happy molecules lived in beer and that light beer was made by taking the happy molecules out of regular beer.

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  4. OK. You all asked for this...

    Which are the happiest and saddest molecules?

    Uranium Phosphide and Deuterated Hydroxy Tungsten Nitride.

    Why? The first is always UP and the second is always DOWN.

    And with that I promise to never again tell a Chemistry joke here.

    You're welcome.

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  5. Ohioan, There must be something in the water.

    That is the sort of behavior I expect from my Dad who grew up to the southeast of Toledo (the Corn Pone Triangle of Elmore/Genoa/Woodville).

    What's with you people, anyway?
    ;)

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  6. Ohioan, as a fellow with a minor in physical chemistry and almost all the classes for a bachelor's in chemical engineering...

    I don't get it!

    Deuterated Hydroxy Tungsten Nitride makes DHTN, not DOWN. Halp! I'm confused!

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  7. Anonymous7:10 AM

    D-Pack (as he is known among his hip-hop followers) is on to some serious chemistrology here. He's talking about hapnium (Hp).

    You probably haven't heard of hapnium because you haven't studied the Vibrational Periodic Table of Universal Karma. Hapnium is a transuranic element with an atomic number of 144, or 12 X 12. Twelve is a magick number in Kaballah. So Hp has kind of a double happy thing going on (hafnium has an atomic number of 72, and was so-named hafnium because it was hafway to Hp).

    As the number of Hp atoms in a given molecule grows, the compound becomes increasingly "happy". When happy substances like beer (as noted above) are metabolized, the Hp is stored in the Third Eye chakra to be released in moments of Transcendental Smoothness.

    When you have "happy" thoughts, the Hp is released from the zenacular orbit of the Third Eye and causes the karmic vibrational aura to become very smooth.

    It's all quite logical when you know the facts.

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  8. Err, thanks Apostate.

    I think.

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  9. KT,

    First "hydroxy" is OH (note the "oxy" part). When written at the front of a line formula that is conventionally written "HO". Deuterated means we've replace "H" by its mass two isomer deuterium, conventionally "D", so we are at "DO". Tungsten (AKA Wolfram) is "W". Nitride is a lone nitrogen atom. Assuming the +4 valance state for the tungsten we end up with "DOWN".

    Dean,

    I know it was sophomoric, but when you learn a bunch of bad chemistry jokes as a sophmore chem major, they come blurping up at the darndest times...

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  10. When you have to explain a joke...

    :-)

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