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Saturday, August 23, 2008

Biden vs. Eisenhower, A Comparison

Well, Barack Obama went and picked Slow Joe Biden as his running mate. This has "catastrophe" written all over it. I'll bet that airhead Obama didn't even consider our suggestion, Dwight Eisenhower. Let's compare the two, shall we?

Management experience: Eisenhower was Supreme Allied Commander and was in charge of whole armies. Biden's never managed anything larger than his checkbook. Advantage, Ike.

Military experience: Eisenhower was a 5-star general. (For those of you on the left, that's a rank, not a movie rating.) Biden might know which end of a gun the stingy things come out of. (This is a great improvement over Obama.) Advantage, Ike.

Legislative experience: Eisenhower was too busy saving all of Western Civilization from the Nazis to do much here. Biden's been a bloviating windbag in the Senate for 36 or so years. Advantage, Biden.

Foreign policy experience: Eisenhower directly managed military units from several nations. Biden has been a gasbag in the Senate on all kinds of foreign policy committees for decades. Advantage, Ike.

Political clout: Eisenhower is a national hero. Biden is a hot air balloon from Delaware that makes people reach for the mute button. Advantage, Ike.

I don't get it at all. We tried to help Obama, we really did. We reached across the aisle with a friendly hand and Obama slapped it away, ignoring our advice which was clearly superior to anything he was getting from his handlers and trainers and feeders.

Well, that tears it. It looks like we'll just have to go put McCain logos on our blog. We didn't want to, but I don't see any choice at all now.

He picked Biden? Are you kidding me?

7 comments:

  1. Anonymous5:36 AM

    Biden — the perfect foil for Palin!

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  2. Anonymous6:28 AM

    "Eisenhower directly managed military units from several nations. Biden has been a gasbag in the Senate on all kinds of foreign policy committees for decades."

    Or "Eisenhower directly managed military units from several nations. Biden has been on congressional junkets to the Ike monuments around the world."

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  3. I'm afraid Ike just won't have worked. Zombies can't run for president. I guess Cthulhu turned him down - better than the alternative.

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  4. So, it appears we have another anti-Zombie-American bigot in our midst. Kelly, I'm surprised! I had expected more of you.

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  5. Dang, that might've even gotten Indy over to Barry's side.

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  6. Anonymous2:07 AM

    Actually, I'm pretty sure that the constitution doesn't say anything about the candidate needing to be alive. A zombie would therefore not be disqualified legally. On reflection, though, I suspect that the *big* hurdle would have been in convincing a Democrat to choose a Republican as his running mate.

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  7. tim - Obama's a uniter, not a divider! What better way to show it then to have reached both across the aisle and across the gulf that separates the living from the dead?

    ReplyDelete