Thursday, January 04, 2018

The Next Big Thing In Hipster Dining

... will be all-you-can-eat jalapeño buffets.

My two jalapeño plants are producing like there's no tomorrow and I'm going to open my restaurant soon. I'm going to make a killing! Just think how great it will be to have piles and piles and piles of jalapeños in front of you and be able to eat as many as you want! Hipsters will pay through the nose for this.

We're talking red and green gold, man.


tom said...

We had some good pepper plants one year, including habaneros. Couldn't use them quickly enough so we froze them and I can't find them any more. Should have thought of a restaurant....

tim eisele said...

That's always the big problem with gardens. Either you get no crop to speak of, or you get so much that you can't possibly eat it all, and your friends start avoiding you so that they don't get stuck with a bunch of vegetables.

And regarding peppers - Some years ago, we had a bunch of friends over, many of whom were the sorts who would claim that they liked spicy foods, the hotter the better. So my wife got a selection of some of the most powerful hot-sauces she could find. One person pretty much summed it all up (after sampling one of the ones that was basically straight capsacin, with a Scoville rating up in the millions):

(With tears streaming down cheeks)
"These are tears of pain. And regret . . . But, mostly pain."

Foxfier said...

Oooh, cut them in half, remove seeds and veins, freeze them and you've got the pepping for stuffed jalapeno heaven!

Tube of sausage (1lb?)
pack of cream cheese

Brown and drain the sausage, add cream cheese and work it through.
Halve, vein, scrape with spoon a bunch of jalapenos.
Stuff with sausage mixture until it's about full.
half-cook bacon and wrap around jalapenos (microwaving a minute works well)
Bake at 350 15-25 minutes or until crispy brown.

Number of jalapenos and amount of bacon depends entirely on the size of the peppers, so.....